Embrace the experience

Buying, selling a home can be an emotional time

By Emily Bracey
NH Mirror Contributor

Shopping for a home should be one of the most exciting experiences you can have. It’s your home, after all.

However, many individuals experience a lot of unhealthy stress with this transition. I believe the main reason is because there is an unspoken emotional experience that comes along with this type of transition.

You meet with Realtors and mortgage lenders who explain the “transaction” process to you. They explain it step by step (if you have a good one) on what to expect when buying or selling a home.

Then all your friends and family give their opinions about how the process should go and poke holes in everything the experts just explained to you.

But no one really talks about what your emotions will go through. For example, no one tells you about the grieving process you may experience when moving from your current home that you raised your family in for the past 15 years, where you can still see the pencil marks on the door of all your children’s growth.

Since you’re excited about the new home you’re entering and looking forward to a new life experience, you can be confused about these feelings when the time comes to move. This is where many people get cold feet. It’s OK to feel the closure of one chapter in your life, even if another one is opening. This is normal.

Little things, such as packing, cleaning, switching schools, mail, utilities and hiring movers, all become overwhelming because of the emotions no one prepares you for.

You think no one experienced this before or surely they would have told you. Wrong. People often keep it to themselves because they think they are the only ones who experience it.

In order to make this transition as smooth as possible, go into the experience with the understanding that your life is going to be in “limbo” for a temporary period and you’re going to be on an emotional roller coaster ride.

Talk to your family about these emotions in the beginning and make some choices on how to handle them when they surface. The best laid plans are the most prepared plans.

Second, allow these emotions to be OK with everyone in your family. When you see a family member experiencing unpleasant emotion, don’t hold resentment or lash back at them. Just understand it’s temporary and it will all go back to normal once the move is complete.

Finally, for a smooth, enjoyable transition, find a Realtor who will spend the time to understand your goals and objectives to minimize the emotional stress of hunting for a new home. You don’t want to waste your time looking at a hundred homes that are nothing close to your vision of what your new place will be like.

Take the time up front to understand what’s important and what you are “really” looking for and don’t get distracted with the homes that appear to be a good deal.

Stay focused and embrace the ride.

Emily Bracey specializes in residential homes in the Hooksett/Concord area with RE/MAX Elite in Hooksett. She can be reached at 413-5023 or ebracey@buysellnh.com.