Cancer 101- What I Learned

By Linn Kurkjian
NH Mirror Contributor

March is Colon Cancer Awareness month, though unfortunately many remain unaware. If you are 50 or older, have a family history of colon cancer or are experiencing any unusual symptoms, speak with your doctor. Colorectal cancer is easily detectable with screening techniques that can catch the cancer when it is still treatable.

Here’s what I learned when my husband was diagnosed with colon cancer: Everybody has a cancer story – and they all want to share them.

Some, without any regard for your feelings, will tell a horrible and tragic tale of misdiagnosis leading to a slow painful death. Others will tell a story of miracles and unexplained survivorship.

Ours is more middle of the road. Diagnosis. Treatment. Cure. No angels on high. No Mexican drug therapies. No orphaned children left behind. It’s the story about how a simple medical procedure saved my husband’s life.
During a routine physical exam, my husband’s doctor thought he noticed something unusual and scheduled him for a colonoscopy. He wasn’t really worried, and neither were we.

That’s when I learned how messy life can truly be. It can be mean – and it fights dirty. It sneaks up on you late at night, or while you’re driving alone in the car, or just when you think things have settled down. And it constantly reminds you who’s boss.

The day of his colonoscopy we found out he had advanced colon cancer – a slow growing tumor that had been there for years. And here’s the kicker – his tumor diagnosis turned out to have nothing to do with the original reason he was referred by his doctor. It was all coincidental, caught because of a simple medical procedure. If not for the colonoscopy, he could have gone on for many years without detection, but of course, by then it would have been too late.

Maybe that’s our true miracle. Just because I don’t believe in angels doesn’t mean they don’t exist. Maybe my husband does secretly believe – and simply called on his angel posse – who, knowing him, all probably look like Nicole Kidman. Maybe it had nothing to do with colonoscopies and science and medicine and everything to do with faith and fighting the good fight. After all, life does love a formidable opponent.

He endured months of surgeries and treatments and anguish. Due to complications, he had a second surgery when his first didn’t go well. He needed a temporary colostomy and six months of chemo and lots of encouragement. He suffered from chemo brain and exaggerated “what if” scenarios. He needed constant encouragement to brush away the dark thoughts. It was exhausting for both of us.

Here I learned yet another lesson. You can love your husband, want to kill him and try to cure him all at the same time. I found that through my vast multitasking skills, I could simultaneously nag at him, hug him and schedule his next specialist appointment.

He had a final surgery almost a year after his initial diagnosis, and they stuffed all of his insides back inside again. He began to recover and revert back to his old self – he’s coming up on two years of being cancer free.

Here’s where I learned my final lesson: Sometimes you can kick life’s ass. The fight or flight phenomenon doesn’t always kick in – sometimes it’s just fight. And sometimes you win.

Linn Kurkjian lives in Dunbarton with her cancer survivor-husband, Glenn Doten. She is the coordinator of the Colon Cancer Alliance Voices of Central New Hampshire Program and can be reached at lkurkjian@ccalliance.org.